Thursday, 8 March 2012 04:49
Today has been moody for me. After reading the girl's tweets... I am worried. Please, get a hang of yourself, I don't want another kin to die. I've lost a mother, I don't want to (sort of) lose another mother. But, to be honest, I kind of... I guess... I have fallen for you. I know, you will not fall for me because, he is still important to you and that, you still love him. I will respect your decision and stay as a friend for now. I am contented enough to spend time with you like that. Well, it was during my time in Japan that I realized it though, my love for you. Suddenly, I just miss talking to you. I miss cutting papers with you. I miss joking with you. I miss everything about you. >///<
I have re-read your blog post, the one about the things you look for in a boyfriend:
1. I can play the guitar, piano, bass (just a little), drums and believe it or not, I can play the Yang Qin. I know it's gay, hahaha!
2. I may not be able to play it now, but I am willing to learn it. It seems fun.
3. (a)I know how to cook. I started to learn cooking on my own ever since my mum passed away. Trust me, I can cook a better Aglio Olio than him. If you want, I can cook Yakisoba for you as well, but you will be my experiment subject. I know how to bake as well, it is an interest since young, pretty much. I love cakes, that's why. (b)I know how to dance, because I was in a dance CCA during Sec school days. I learnt basically break dancing. I didn't join dance in Poly because I wanted to try something new. (c)Therefore I joined the Kendo club in SP. And so now I know Kendo. xD (d)I can draw relatively well. But I didn't go for an art course in SP because I was more interested in music back then. (e)Photography skills. But my DSLR is a bit faulty now, it doesn't do my photos any justice. Getting a new one soon! (f)Recently learnt paper modelling because of you, and I am getting a hang of it. :) Is that a cool skill?
4. You know me, hardcore NIGHTMARE and the GazettE fan. I am a fan of Laruku too, and of course X-Japan. If you wish to go to Laruku's concert, I can help you pay for the tickets first, then you slowly pay me back. I will go with you too, if you want to go. I'm more into VK though, not that much into Oshare Kei, like Spiv States, and SuG all those.
5. You have seen how I dress myself when I go to town. Well... I don't wear Sarueru pants like he does, because I can't pull it off well enough. But I do have a closet full of asymmetrical shirts and scarfs, they are my favorites. :D
6. Hell yes I do. :D
7. I can't now, but maybe if we are together, I will. :)
8. Why not? They are cute cuddly bears. :D
9. Don't I always? Hahahaha!
10. Well... I won't say I am matured entirely. I still act like a kid sometimes, but of course I know when is the right time to joke around, and when I need to be serious. You can trust me for that.
11. I think I do have a little... Kendo trainings might not be as hard and tiring as Taiko trainings, the bokkens are not as heavy as your nagado drums. But swinging bokkens around ain't an easy task either. I don't have back muscles yet... but I think I have arm and leg muscles already. :D
12. I am, all the time.
13. I cannot guarantee that I will always have time for you. But, I will always make time for you. You will be my first priority.
14. I promise, no secrets. :)
15. もちろん。
16. We are humans, we aren't perfect. No one is. But two imperfect people, will perfect each other.
17. I cannot guarantee you forever. But, I will give you a lifetime. I truly love you, and if we are together, I will love you every single minute till fate or death do us apart.
18. Yes, it is the "I will want to marry you in the future" that kind of a like. :)
I know what the answer will most likely be though. Take your time, let's not rush things. I will still treat you as a friend, only closer. I will respect you as a friend, as someone I love. I will wait, until the time is right, and I will ask you personally again. Asking you to be my girlfriend in an online manner is just too insincere. Yawn~ I spent a whole night typing this. I'm going to sleep now! Goodnight, girl. :) Sweet dreams.
